Mr. Uri Geller, now known as "The Unsinkable Uri Geller," was selling a "Mindpower Kit" back in the early 90's. This consisted of a book, a 60-minute audio tape, a quartz crystal, and a "meditation circle." The crystal was a scrap of quartz - quite undistinguished indeed, and the meditation device was a thin piece of glossy white card, 18.3 cm by 21 cm, with a 13.5 cm orange-colored circle printed on it. The instructions for the circle were clear: "If you need help to clear or focus your mind, use the card with the orange meditation circle that comes with this kit. Hold it in front of you and look at it for a couple of minutes. Concentrate on the circle and nothing else. After a short time, your mind will detach itself." Hmmm. I would think that your mind would have to already be detached, to go through such a sacrament. But I'm rather skeptical about such things.

There was much more: "You can hold your crystal, the one that comes with the kit, and concentrate on the calming energy it gives you. This will enable you to tap into your awareness of another plane." You should be informed that these magical tools - the crystal and the orange spot were the subject of Mr. Geller's repeated attention for "recharging." The buyer was told: "In order for you to achieve the maximum benefit from the tools in The Mindpower Kit, Uri Geller will personally empower the orange meditation circle and the crystal contained in the kit. On the first day of every month at 11:00 A.M. and 11:00 P.M. (Greenwich Mean Time), Uri will focus all his mental power on all the kits sold throughout the world to empower the circle and the crystal with positive energy. This will enhance the ability of these important tools to help you as you visualize, meditate, use your willpower, or practice any of the techniques Uri has described in this book."

It was suggested that the owner might also wish to " . . . imagine Uri as he appears on the cover of this book and picture him sending his energy to you." A table of time zones was appended, so that the owner could co- ordinate recharging with Uri. The mind boggles. . . .

It appears that the enchanted orange spot was supposed to work over TV, too. I recently received a posting from Harriett, a friend in the UK. She wrote: "In April 1994, Geller was on a morning TV programme with his 'orange dot.' Apparently, if you touched this orange dot on your TV screen this would assist you to lose weight." Well, neither this "making psychic contact by electronics" notion, nor the "magic spot" scheme, is original with Uri Geller. Both go 'way back.

In the early days of radio, evangelist Oral Roberts used to ask you to place a hand on the radio receiver - leaving the other hand free to make out a check payable to Reverend Roberts - and he would arrange for divine blessings to be sent up your arm and into your body. When TV arrived, the same gimmick was used, but much more effectively, because the worshiper could feel a tingle from the cathode-ray-tube (picture tube) due to the high voltage on its surface. And, back in the early 80's a pair of well-meaning matrons was featured in the National Enquirer along with a blue spot - of exactly the same shape! - printed next to their photo. That spot was said to bring about similar miracles when touched.

The incredible instruction book that accompanied the Mindpower Kit rhapsodized on the additional wonders that may be achieved with the powerful Orange Spot - perhaps because blue spots are of lesser potency. As we all know, much dedication and self-sacrifice must be expended in order to perform compass-moving, psychic appliance repair, and spoon-bending à la Geller, unless one should choose to do these things by trickery. But the Spot was said to facilitate these procedures. Said Mr. Geller, "If you aren't having much luck getting your broken watches and clocks to start working again, place them on the orange circle card that comes with this kit, then do the same experiment and see if that makes a difference. The orange circle is a very important tool, and you should use it to concentrate your powers. . . . At the same time, look deep into my eyes in the photograph on the front cover of this kit. What should you wish for? It might be better health, it might be a new job, it might be relief from pain, or it might be selling your house. Whatever you want, concentrate completely on it for three minutes. When the time's up, put your broken appliance on the circle and see what happens. . . . But don't take my word for it - try it yourself and see what happens! And don't forget to write to me if something strange or interesting happens to you."

There were individuals who took umbrage with Mr. Geller's claims for the product. One chap in the Isle of Man issued a complaint through the UK Advertising Council, and their finding was that "Uri Geller's complete kit for harnessing the power of your mind includes a personally energized crystal, an audio tape of Uri talking directly about mind exercises, his book explaining unique mind-enhancing techniques and his famous orange dot for concentrating your thought powers on." The kit included, said the Council of the Secretariat, "a testimonial from Uri Geller that said 'I have personally empowered this crystal for you.'" The complainant from the Isle of Man had challenged whether the claims could be substantiated. The complaint was upheld. The Authority noted that the ads for the kit had appeared in a magazine about the paranormal, but did not consider that that was sufficient justification for publishing unsubstantiated claims. They asked the advertisers not to use similar claims in the future.

Not one to pass up an opportunity for testing any theory, I am announcing my own Spot, which can be seen here in all its purity and power. I have chosen pink because I live in Florida, and that would seem to be appropriate for the official JREF Pink Spot. The official talisman appears with this article. Accept no substitutes! I will ask, in the true spirit of scientific research, that my readers test the efficacy of the JREF Pink Spot. This will be an attempt to discover whether equal results can be obtained through a computer screen!

Report to me any and all powers that you may discover this charm to have. Try every way you can to utilize its awesome potential. Did it help you choose winning stocks? Did headaches vanish when you rubbed your forehead against the screen? Were children better behaved after staring at the pink talisman? Have ugly warts dropped away with tiny screams as you exposed them to the formidable influence of the Pink Circle ? Do rainstorms abate when you hold the Spot to the sky? Have you thrown out your supply of Viagra, now that this "natural" treatment is available to you?

We will report to you the results of this earthshaking technological innovation in a future update.