A company called Ancient Minerals is selling magnesium supplements that are applied to the skin rather than taken orally. Somewhat ungrammatically, they claim that "some benefits of Ancient Minerals magnesium products" include:

- Restores cellular magnesium levels
- Natural cellular protectant
- Facilitates safe and effective detoxification
- Relief of aches, pains, spasms
- Elevates mood and relieves stress
- Encourages healthy skin tissue
- Helps maintain proper muscle function
- Boosts energy levels
- Supports a healthy immune system
- Balances the hormonal system
- Calms overactive nerves
- Improves quality of sleep

There is some scientific evidence that magnesium supplementation can benefit certain health conditions, especially for patients who are deficient in magnesium. This list of alleged benefits, however, goes way beyond the evidence.

But Ancient Minerals isn't peddling just any magnesium. This magnesium is special. It's... ancient!

"Genuine Zechstein™ magnesium stands alone as the purest and most pristine source of natural magnesium salts in the world." What do they mean by pure? Their own lab analysis shows that it contains a whole list of impurities from aluminum to selenium. Apparently "pure" means that it has been buried in an ancient seabed for 250 million years, so it has been isolated from all the toxins humans have introduced into the environment.

They also claim it has a raw natural energy or frequency or life force or something. They cite Dr. Masaru Emoto's research. He played classical music to water and got it to form beautiful crystals; he cursed at water and got it to form ugly mush. I couldn't quite see the connection, but apparently they think ancient magnesium has positive energy instead of negative energy. Or something.

Aging may improve cheese, wines, and Scotch, but I don't think it works for minerals.